Step-children - read at your peril

Don't marry a man with kids. That is my advice to you today. I did, nine years ago, and married into a nice little family of Mark and his two children then aged 6 & 7, (D & C), who were quite lovely, and there was an ex-wife, (R),hovering around who seemed quite happy for me to be the step-mother. In the dark background was a veangeful ex-girlfriend, (L),with two other children (then aged 2 & nearly 4 - L & C). There was a hideous access battle going on when we married for L & C & seemed like it would not be resolved anytime soon. The day we arrived back from honeymoon in Venice (the best time & place ever), L called to say Mark could see L & C. From there on in for around 3 years, our marriage was a nightmare. I did not understand the way Mark behaved with the kids - he seemed to need to shut me out in order to prioritise them. I resented this and subsequently behaved like shit. They were dark, dark times. Then I had Oliver, sunshine of my life, and, to cut a very long and very dull story short, there were periods of time without L&C and without D, and life ticked along very nicely just seeing C & being with Oliver & Mark. Relationships with the children are clouded by the attitudes/behaviours of their mothers (naturally the major influence on their lives), and now the situation is that it is Siberia between R & ourselves (more with me) and worse with L, who should be locked up for insanity I am sure. This week I am sick to death of step children, having seemingly upset C last week, and now out of the blue having accusing/abusive texts from L. We need to leave......